Sexolve 240: ‘My Boyfriend Loses His Erection When I’m On Top’

Sexolve 240: ‘My Boyfriend Loses His Erection When I’m On Top’

“It is great which you recognise your significance of pleasure. If you’d prefer, you are going to discuss.” writes Harish Iyer.

(Trigger Warning: Some concerns might make you’re feeling agitated. Reader discernment is recommended.)

Sexolve is equal liberties activist Harish Iyer’s Q&A room on FIT.

For you if you have any queries regarding sex, sexuality, or your relationship, and need some advice, answers, or just someone to hear you out – write to Harish Iyer, and he’ll try and ‘sexolve’ it. Drop-in a mail to

This week’s Q&As are below:

My Boyfriend Loses His Erection When I’m At The Top

Dear RainbowMan,

I will be a 27 yr old girl in deep love with a 28 12 months old guy. We now have had a tremendously delighted and taking place relationship when it comes down to intercourse. We’ve been actually experimented and good inside our intercourse. Nonetheless, We have a strange issue with my boyfriend. He likes it once we have intercourse and then he is acceptably rough, he attempts to make up to their otherwise personality that is quiet. Nonetheless, there clearly was point as he loses their erection, more often than not. That’s instabang whenever we carry on top of him as he is resting. Their penis begins resting too. He very quickly loses their erection. We take to various roles him, but he loses it all the time or sometimes his penis even misses my vagina while I am on top of. We don’t learn how to keep their penis on once I get on top of him. Everyone loves the experience once I have always been in addition to a guy and their fully erect penis is inside my vagina. We additionally end up feeling like, its my blunder which he is not around in this place. But, i do believe I shall never ever be in a position to experience by using this boyfriend. Please assist in maintaining their banner hoisted. Else we might want to satisfy other males who are able to give me that feeling. Do you know what after all? perhaps maybe Not being rude, judge me personally I need to experience what I want to experience if you want to – but. Just one single life, I have, we don’t like to spend with only the pleasure of 1.

Skip Interrupted

Dear Skip Interrupted,

Many thanks a great deal for the heartfelt mail. I will be happy that your particular partner along with a sex that is fulfilling otherwise. Understand this being a hiccup that is small.

There might be a few reasons for him losing their erection just in this place and also this could be because he might never be stimulated in this kind of place.

Often focusing a lot of in the technique and process may move from the essence of relationship. Have actually you tried focussing on love, conversations, cuddles, dental stimulation? Possibly, then it shall just slip in and stay “hoisted”?

It’s good which you recognise your importance of pleasures.

There’s nothing incorrect about wanting love or wanting intercourse, or wanting a form of intercourse or wanting more intercourse with another partner. We’re able to have these deep conversations with our main lovers without making our lovers feel ashamed about on their own or their health.

Its for the couple to determine exactly just what form they would like to give their relationship – polyamourous or monogamous. It really is a couple in this relationship and both should consent to your form the connection is using. Make certain that it really is a discussion rather than a choice this is certainly thrust on him.

You will discuss if you love. If you’d prefer, you can expect to comprehend the guidelines. You would not hurt other partners by making them feel like temporary props in the bargain of keeping your flame alive with your primary partner if you love.

I’m not somebody who would shame you for having desires and for performing on them. I might simply let you know that perhaps the most complex of things could be resolved with empathy and kindness.